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| Los Campesinos - Romance Is Boring |
| Written by Laura Prior | ||||
  Something they seem to know a lot aboutImaginary Los Campesinos! Playlist 1. Here Comes The First Track, Better Make It Good. 2. Here’s a Faster Number For The Second. 3. Fromily Had a Twitter, But Then She Deleted it Because Her Mother Started Drinking Too Much in the Daytime. 4. I’m Wondering What My Body Would Look Like From Space, Hurtling Towards The Sun in One of Those Panda Hats Katy Perry Wears. 5. Oh, My Jedward Head! (Flaming Lips ‘88-’92 Would Not Have Passed The X-Factor Audition Stage). Happy Hanukah, Sebastian! Twee, if it ever was, is no longer a term of endearment. It's a word to describe knobs wearing expensive glasses and designer cardigans, trying too hard to pretend they're troubled and have no friends. If you want to describe it less brutally, Belle & Sebastian opened and closed the book (then Put the Book Back on the Shelf – hahahah, yes! Score) on twee. Loadsa members, songs about songs, songs with the band in the lyrics, interesting release patterns, subtle Jesus-humping lyrics, riding on City buses for a hobby being sad, etc. They aren’t even that twee…really. Well, maybe they are a bit. The main difference between them and Los Campesinos! is that you can listen to more than 4 minutes of their music without wanting to batter them all. They’re so self-aware, it’s like being in a really shit Dawson’s Creek episode written by a bunch of 3rd Year Film Studies students holding a John Peel tribute night in a mansion. Romance is Boring is another LP, or EP, or TWAT (The War Against Twee) attack by the opposition. It’s chock full of the usual shite. Little tries at Pavement (This is a Flag. There is no Wind), Arab Strap (The Sea is a Good Place to Think of the Future), Art Brut (the sing-shouty delivery of every word). Songs about drinking stolen vodka, space, indie boys having breakdowns in Rough Trade, or whatever else it is they sing about when Hefner have turned off their anti-plagiarism programming. It’s like being on a student bus for an hour with a bunch of twats wearing flatcaps, shouting self-consciously about Haruki Murakami and their parents’ divorces. The instrumentals and xylophones build up as usual, songs try so hard to get to the next point they prematurely begin somewhere in the middle of the next song, then revert back, then give up. Then the next song starts. It’s enough to endure a really MASSIVE brain tumour. It’s got the same interludes as with every LC! Song, where the music parts so they can shout stuff in unison, in a really sarky way about other people being rubbish. It’s hard to give a shit that some anorexic bird in a flowing dress and flowery hairband called Dominique or Poppy, or something, won’t nut him. The only positive lyrics seem to be about the band themselves, and how perceptive and ironic and sneering they are about everything. I Warned You Not to Make an Enemy of Me”, is anything off Forward Russia’s Give me a Wall reimagined by hipster beanie babies. It’s not very scary. “I warned you, don’t make an enemy of me!” Hahaha, alright son!
Label: Wichita
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